Thursday, October 20, 2005

I search and search and cannot find the reason for the heavy weight of my despair. What have I done to be punished this way. Why am I so weak. Why are there no other arms but her's that comfort me.

Friday, October 07, 2005

I don't feel like being with anyone. I want to be alone, away from any sort of distraction, so that I could let my mind out of all this chaos. I want to search for the real reason of all this absurdity. I want to know what they really mean when they claim that I am depressed. Can these people really prove that I am depressed. It is really easy to judege others, but not so easy to justify your judgement. It is just like the court-rooms in this city. It is really easy for the judge to condemn the accused but the turth is that the judge is never certain about his decision.
So am I really depressed. I myself, don't even know for certain whether I am or not, so how can they know for sure. Where exactly is that line of certainty in one's decision making. I don't even think there's such line. I think the reality is that truth is what we want to be and not what really is.
I don't believe in absolute truth anymore. Many men have searched for the truth and neither have found it. I believe they have searched all paths, which I may go through if in search of truth. I now know truth is simply an axiom created by imagination. This axiom has the essence of truth to human mind, only because it is created by the human mind. I shall never search for the real truth anymore but instead create it for the sake of my peace for my mind is in chaos only in the absence of truth.